You probably build websites and think your work is special. You think your 13 megabyte parallax-ative home page is going to get you some Awwward banner you can glue to the top corner of your site. You think your 40-pound jQuery file and 83 polyfills give IE7 a boost because it finally has box-shadow. Wrong. Let me describe your perfect website:
You. Are. Over-designing. Look at this. It's a simple website. Why do you need to animate a trendy banner flag when I hover over that useless piece of content? You spent hours on it and added 80 kilobytes to your site, and some user jabbing at it on their iPad with fat fingers will never see that. Not to mention blind people will never see that, but they don't see any of your content.
You never knew it, but this is your perfect website. Here's why.
This entire page weighs less than the gradient-meshed Facebook logo on your Wordpress site. Did you seriously load 100kb of jQuery UI just so you could animate the background color of a div? You loaded all 7 fontfaces of a shitty webfont just so you could say "Hi." at 100px height at the beginning of your site? You piece of work.
You thought you needed media queries to be responsive, but no. Responsive means that it responds to whatever screensize it's viewed on. This site doesn't care if you're on an iMac or a Tamagotchi.
Look at this. You can read it ... that is, if you can read. It makes sense. It has hierarchy. It's using HTML5 tags so you and your browser know what's in this site. That's semantics.
It has content on the screen. Your site has three bylines and a link to your Dribbble account, but you spread it over 7 full screens and make me click some bobbing button to show me how cool the jQuery ScrollTo plugin is.
Cross-browser compatibility? Load this in IE6. I dare you.